QUOTE

I've been a Facebook junkie but there is so many posts I need to do and I will. I promise they're coming but I ran across this quote and wanted to share....

"SOMETIMES WE PUT UP WALLS NOT TO KEEP PEOPLE OUT,
BUT TO SEE WHO REALLY CARES ENOUGH TO BREAK THEM DOWN."

I have to admit that I do a little bit of both. I do it for protection but also to see if there really are people who sincerely care. Let's just say lately, I've found out who some of my real friends were. Not to say that you aren't a real friend if you haven't been around. It was just an eye opener for me this past month or so.

Thank you to all of those who have reached out to me when I needed someone. I can't express the gratitude that I feel in my heart. Many of you know and some may not but I'm coming to peace with it all. I'll be OK.....

My Baby turned "5"....

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAWSON......

I'll post the pics of his bday later but I just wanted to put some pics of him and tell him I love him. I wish that I was more like him and full of life, can laugh at anything, and for the most part easy going. For instance, yesterday was his bday and I've been going through a lot in my life right now plus battling with being sick. Well yesterday was preschool and I am suppose to pick him up at 10:30 well I didn't hear my alarm (that's a first)and I frantically woke up at 12:00 and realized, Where's DAWSON? I threw on some clothes that I realized when I got there were inside out, threw my hair up in a pony all crazy and ran out the door. When I got there he was so calm and didn't really care or even realize that I was 1 1/2 hrs late picking him up. I was devastated and felt like a really bad mom (on his bday of all days). He was so calm and happy. Dawson, thanks for being you.... I love you forever, for always, and no matter what. Love Mom

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FACEBOOK

Sorry, I've neglected by blog because I signed up for Facebook. I've found so many people I know and got reacquainted with a few. Also times haven't been the easiest for me so I haven't really had a lot of positive things to say so I haven't wanted to say anything at all. I have several posts in mind it's just a matter of time.

Scars

I've been meaning to do this one for awhile now but I was without my computer for about 4 weeks and also was trying to decide if I would continue to blog or not. But here it goes:


Skyler's back from scoliosis, fused ribs, and chest wall deformities. This picture shows his scars from all his back surgeries that he has had and will continue to have.



Amazing medicine at it's best. The devices that saved his life. I am so proud of him that he would allow me to take these pictures. For those for didn't know him when he was littlier he would never have allowed me to take these pictures. But now he is not shy or ashamed of who or how he is. I hope this lasts forever.
This is another picture of Skyler where he had his abdominal hernia removed when he was just 10 days old and his drain tube from his first spine surgery at 10 months.



This is just a picture of John and one of the many scars he has gotten from working. Many of the pictures didn't turn out like I wish they would have or they were to gruesome to post. Like the memories of the scars when he was assaulted and left helpless at the side of the road. But we've moved on and learned a lot but haven't forgot.



These are pictures of the adventure I underwent last year with 5 surgeries and the reminder that I am very lucky to have made it out of one of them. But I don't regret trying it. I'm just saddened that it didn't work out like we all wished, dreamed, and hoped it would.




Scars are a part of life. They are who makes us who we are. I look at the scars on my body and can tell you about most of them. I have a scar on my arm that reminds me not to talk on the phone and straighten your hair at the same time. The lessons that we have gained from these scars. I look at the scars on my children especially Skyler and how proud I am of those scars and who he's become. If you think of scars really they can tell a story. We should not be ashamed of our scars. For instance, look at the scars that our on Jesus' hands. They are for us and they paved a path for us. I guess what I'm saying is these are only scars that you can see but I know that at least I have inner scars as well but as they've healed they have strengthened me. I'm not ashamed of them for without them I would not be who I am today and without my Savior's scars I could not return home to dwell with him and my Father in Heaven. So in closing I am so thankful for ALL of my scars and you should be too.

Precious Moments...but left a lasting impression

As many of you are aware, we put our kids in a new charter school this year and it's been kind of rough. We had mostly downs but a few positives. John and I have been going back and forth about if we made the right decision or what to do next.

My life has been a rollercoaster ride lately and yesterday I was sitting on the couch and Jordan said to me, "Mom not that this person is not a good mom because I don't want you to think that but," he said something like I'm glad your my mom because you make us better and more responsible. You make us do chores, scrub toilets, do dishes, laundry, clean our rooms, take out trash and you should have us vaccuum and do something else. You ground us. I ask him if he knew why and I told him it was because I loved him.

He of course, asked me to never tell this person. But this made a lasting impression on me. That I'm raising my children with values and a brand if you will. More to come about what I mean by brand from our adult session of Stake Conference. I hugged him and told him I loved him and that just made my whole day.

Jordan, thank you for teaching me along the way. I love you.

Six Things that Make ME Happy...

I was tagged by Amanda.Six things that make me happy!

I suppose to write six things that make me happy. When Amanda tagged me, I said to myself I better hurry and think because I know if I don't then I won't have anyone else left to tag after someone else was also tagged because we have a lot of the same friends. But I also realized that it was okay and that I needed some time to think about what truly makes me happy. Right now I've been struggling with a lot of different things and I needed to take some time and truly think about what makes me happy and this is what I came up with.

1. The Atonement of Jesus Christ
2. My Family
3. My Amazing Friends (just hangin' out or talking on the phone)
4. Music
5. Ocean or rivers (the sense of calm and peace)
6. Last but not least SLEEP!

*Link to the person who has tagged you. Write down six things that make you happy. Post the rules, tag six others and let them know you did it. Then tell the person when your entry is complete. I tag Steph, Jessie, Vida, Candace, and whoever else who wants to do this because all the others have been taken that I would have chosen but you know what it's okay. Also, Rachel, Jen, Brianna, and Leah I still want to see your responses even though you were already tagged by someone else.

Opportunity Knocked

I have some friends that have done triathlons. I never really had any interest in doing one. I really didn't think I could ever do it. Guess what? I am, I can, and I will! That's my motto. My dad's response was kind of funny to this because he said so much for your bucket list. He meant because on my bucket list I have that I want to bungee jump, sky dive, and not quite sure what else but know it's a triathlon. I'm excited and scared at the same time.

It's hard to get motivated to start. I need to do this for me. The sense of accomplishment that I will feel. Well anyway, it was our wards turn to clean the church so I decided to have John drop me off and I would run home after I was done. A neighbor said your not running home and I told her that I was because I was going to being doing a triathlon with some other members in our ward. And I said something stupid and didn't mean it the way it came out. (Sorry!) I said if ##$%&*@ can do it after just having a baby then I can. I about died the whole way home feeling awful because I didn't mean it the way that it came out. I meant that I need to do this and I was so happy that I had others to do it with me and help support me. So anyway, my progress is slow but I'm not giving up. I just started and need all the encouragement and support that I can get.

I know that through this their is only empowerment. I ran and walked and ran and walked but I was proud of myself when I got home that I can do it and I did. It was about a mile and a half and it took about 20 minutes and 30 seconds. I know it wasn't the fastest but I finished and that's the way I'm looking at the triathlon. I don't care if I come it last because at least I did it.

Wish me luck!

Mean Mums

I received this email from one of my friends in Australia and I just wanted to share. I'm trying to get out of my blogging slump and I need to catch up but until then here some food for thought. Love ya Julie!

Mean Mums


Someday when my children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates a parent, I will
tell them, as my Mean Mum told me: I loved you
enough . . . to ask where you were going, with whom,
and what time you would be home.

I loved you enough to be silent and let you
discover that your new best friend was a creep.

I loved you enough to stand over you for two hours
while you cleaned your room, a job that should have taken 15 minutes.

I loved you enough to let you see anger,
disappointment, and tears in my eyes. Children must
learn that their parents aren't perfect.

I loved you enough to let you assume the
responsibility for your actions even when the
penalties were so harsh they almost broke my heart.

But most of all, I loved you enough . . to say
NO when I knew you would hate me for it.

Those were the most difficult battles of all. I'm
hope I won them, because in the end you win, too.
And someday when your children are old enough to
understand the logic that motivates parents, you will tell them....



Was your Mum mean? I know mine was. We had the
meanest mother in the whole world! While other kids
ate candy for breakfast, we had to have cereal, eggs, and toast.

When others had a Pepsi and a Twisties for lunch, we had to eat sandwiches.

And you can guess our mother made us a dinner that was
different from what other kids had, too.

And some mothers didn't even make their kids dinners!


Mother insisted on knowing where we were at all
times. You'd think we were convicts in a prison. She
had to know who our friends were, and what we were
doing with them. She insisted that if we said we
would be gone for an hour, we would be gone for an hour or less.

We were ashamed to admit it, but she had the nerve
to break the Child Labor Laws by making us work We
had to wash the dishes, make the beds, learn to
cook, vacuum the floor, do laundry, empty the trash
and all sorts of cruel jobs. I think she would lie
awake at night thinking of more things for us to do.

She always insisted on us telling the truth, the
whole truth, and nothing but the truth. By the time
we were teenagers, she could read our minds and had
eyes in the back of her head. Then, life was really tough!

Mother wouldn't let our friends just honk the horn
when they drove up. They had to come up to the door
so she could meet them. While everyone else could
date when they were 12 or 13, we had to wait until we were 16.

Because of our mother we missed out on lots of
things other kids experienced. None of us have ever
been caught shoplifting, vandalising other's
property or ever arrested for any crime. It was all her fault.

Now that we have left home, we are all educated,
honest adults. We are doing our best to be mean
parents just like Mum was.

I think that is what's wrong with the world today.
It just doesn't have enough mean mums!


PASS THIS ON TO ALL THE MEAN MOTHERS YOU KNOW.
(And Their Kids!!!)

So are you or did you have a mean mum.....